How to Date a Chinese Woman!

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As we all know Chinese women can look incredibly exotic, not only because of their eyes and skin, but also because of the fact they come from a culture so different from our own. Really and truly, Chinese culture is vastly different from most types of western culture, and this is especially true of the native English-speaking countries such as America, Canada and The United Kingdom.

Bearing all this in mind we get to the question: ‘does this effect how to date Chinese women?’ I would have to say, after living in China for over eight years and also dating Chinese women in my own country, that the answer would have to be a definite ‘yes’.

With this in view lets take a look at a few things that will definitely help us date a Chinese woman and not make mistakes which may cost us in one way or another:

Getting A Date

If you are planning on dating a mainland Chinese woman, either in China or in your own country, you may find getting what you ‘think’ is a date is actually not that hard at all. With most Chinese women, going out to dinner is simply considered a friendly thing to do. It’s actually a very large part of their culture. They may or may not connect it in their mind to romantic/sexual interest from you. You want to take them out, ok, simply ask (it can be really that simple)!

Generating Attraction

Assuming you followed point one you will now be well on your way, but here’s the more difficult part, getting her to be attracted to you! Attraction can be a complex thing, but after having dated hundreds of Chinese women I can tell you, with Chinese women, and the conformity created by Confucian culture, there are some tried and tested techniques which always do the trick…

Here is one that really works well, when she tells you not to do something during the date (and she will), she may suggest she doesn’t like you smoking or drinking or something she wants you to change, simply reply with a seemingly indifferent response that you will do what you want, when you want, but that you are ‘willing to negotiate’ (say that last part with a smile on your face). It’ll surprise you that if you do this over time it will lead to attraction in her, and not as some might think, repulsion.


Getting more intimate with a Chinese female can be tricky due to many males thinking they should follow what they have read about Chinese women being ‘traditional’. Actually a lot of what you’ve read before may even hinder you, rather than help you. But leaving that aside, let me teach you a simple ‘bridging technique ‘I always use:

Now, you may have heard that when you date Chinese women they are shy and you shouldn’t be too affectionate as it’s not part of their culture. Whereas it is true culturally and historically, the good news is that as a non-Chinese, they will actually expect certain differences and will give you some leeway! I suggest every now and then you should touch her upper arm or back when appropriate, in particular when you’re crossing the road with her, or some other similar situation.

This will actually give her a sense of protection that’ll lead to more intimacy over time; this is one simple bridging technique that if combined with some others can really amp-up her attraction to you, and put you ‘in the zone’.

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